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For an example, a game like WAR might be talked about wk zed as though PVP is the way to "win" at the game. But, that is not the only thing to do in the game, and even within pvp there are goals that can be set by the player (i.e. playing naked, racking up deaths instead of kills.)
In WAR you can do PVE content and have a grand time, and in most MMO's you will hardly ever HAVE TO do anything. The only way an MMO can force a goal on you is to stop you from playing their game if you do not play within a certain set of rules. The name of the game(s) is to exist within the world, not to do certain activities.
That's why checkers sucks as an MMO: there are no choices, and only one true goal.
In a game like Vanguard or WoW, for example, many players say that the "goal" is to "beat" the end-game. Of course, that is only true for those players that decide to attempt that goal, and not for players that simply do other things.
(In a funny side example, my ex co-host Luper had asked lead developer Silius for some visual variety in a certain classes highest level uber armor, and he simply answered by telling her that if you go after a certain set of armor, you might look the same as the other players going after that same armor.
In that case, yes, there is a set of rules, guidelines and standards, but only followed by those wanting to play in those very strict boundaries.)